Random Ramblings

Getting to know Myself

getting-to-know-myself

I have experienced so many changes in a short amount of time.

I moved over 1000 miles away from family and friends.screen-shot-2016-12-11-at-2-54-55-pm

I left a career that was incredibly fulfilling and felt like I was contributing greatly to my community. readiness_logodesign_delaware_final

I grew in my convictions and values. 

I chose to change direction with my career and pursue a dream I never thought I’d have the chance to make a reality.

I have been demeaned, insulted, and “unfriended” due to my choices and beliefs.

I am more informed than I have ever been in the past from a lot of research. I have more headaches from said research.

I am more politically involved than I ever have been before. jimhightower1

I am exhausted. 

I work for myself, for no pay. The price I am paying in the now, for what I want in the future.

I am now a writer for the Military Spouse Advocacy Network. logomsan-01-2-clear-background

I still need to work on spending too much time on social media.

I’ve lost ten pounds, but I feel my motivation dwindling.

I feel like I am more myself than I ever have been. 

I think everyone should spend more time reflecting on themselves and what they have done for their community in the last year. If the answer is nothing, you should feel guilty. We have become a very selfish society.

I spend too much time worried about saying the right things in the right way, which sometimes leads to saying nothing at all. 191

I can usually see both sides of an argument and have a hard time choosing sides, this leads to headaches as well. Sometimes I wish I wasn’t as understanding so I could be more firm in my convictions.

I don’t think I’ve truly grieved the loss of both my parents.

I am angry and defensive that my success is judged by the amount of my paycheck or lack thereof. I feel like I have achieved a lot, but will be discredited regardless.

I wish I could fix so many things I see wrong, but feel overwhelmed. I still do what I can, but worry it isn’t enough.

I wish people were more openminded. I wish people knew what it was like to live in poverty. To feel hopeless and unsupported. I wish there wasn’t a stigma around mental health and better resources. I wish people weren’t assholes.

I made new friends, grew closer with old friends, and distanced myself from others.

I traveled. I tried new things.

I laughed until I cried. I made others laugh too.

I changed. I grew. the-great-thing-in-this-world-is-not-so-much-where-you-stand-as-in-what-direction-you-are-moving

 

I found an old quote I first read 10 years ago. It’s truer today, than it was 10 years ago.

“I want to be free to act, and I also want my actions to mean something”

 

Do your actions mean something? Spend some time reflecting on your life today. Will you like what you see?

 

 

 

One thought on “Getting to know Myself

  1. Change is hard! I think it’s great that you are really trying to be your best self. That’s all that really matters. You cannot control what others think of you, how they value or devalue you. If someone is judging me about something I like to think that they must not know my very well if that is their only complaint 😉

    Like

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